I let you into my life. I didn’t ask for you to make your appearance, but strolling into my heart with your smile and singing eyes, it just happened. At a time when I was vulnerable, your dry humor pulled a laugh from my lungs. Your unexpected kiss sealed the deal. How could I go from hiding my blushing cheeks to eagerly awaiting the vibrations of my cell phone? What had you done?
The peace I felt with you in my home was unparalleled. Our gentle teasing back and forth, our daily YouTube marathons and our cultural exchanges brightened my days. Comforted by the knowledge that you accepted me for who I am, I shared, and shared, and shared my life with you. What a fool I was.
You knew that our relationship could never be and yet you made your move. One night, you said you couldn’t hold back your lips. The flood gates opened and I resisted with enormous restraint. Suddenly, your arms wrapped around me and my walls came crumbling down. Enveloped by the warmth of your skin, like a greeting from an old friend, I fell helpless to your charm.
Who knows what might have happened if our stars twinkling in the sky had never crossed paths? Nay, what future would have followed if our budding love had never been forbidden by these same crossed stars in the first place?
I choose not to think about that. I don’t live my life in ifs. I’ve been hurt by ifs before. I know what real love is, and it does not mean plugging your phone into an IV and plunging the needle deep into your blood stream. Love is given and received. Love is not a one-way road.
Well, as they say, you snooze you lose.
I let you into my life. You made your appearance for a reason. Call me naïve, call me gullible, call me what you want. You came into my life and served a purpose. You were only meant to grace my existence for a short rotation of the moon. Our stars have pursued their trajectories after a brief but bright brush in the sky. You are no longer needed in my life, nor am I beneficial to yours.
Let it go. Let it be. Forgive and forget. Better to have loved and lost… Insert other clichés here. I will rest easy tonight knowing that your voice won’t haunt my dreams. Thanks for the memories but from now on I need to save room for those who will feverishly strive to prove their love.
The one who won’t be played or hurt anymore.